Intimacy from the Inside Out Courage and Compassion in Couple Therapy [Hardcover]

Couples in distress enter therapy holding two goals that they now experience as mutually exclusive: to feel loved and to feel understood. Toni Herbine-Blanks powerful new brand of couple therapy, Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO), offers a comprehensive conceptual map for achieving both goals. In a tour de force of elegant case illustrations wrapped around clear instruction, this book shows the IFIO therapist working with the natural subdivisions  or parts  of the human mind in a dyad, guiding and supporting couples to understand how they project childhood injury into current relationships and then, feeling threatened, frustrated and angry, lose track of their underlying needs to feel safe, connected and loved. With a focus on generating internal attachment stability to sustain each partner through the moments when the other is unavailable, couples in IFIO therapy reconnect with their essential needs, change their conversations and learn to make requests that invite rather than threaten in order to get those needs met.

Foreword Richard Schwartz  Introduction 1. The Origins of Intimacy from the Inside Out Therapy  I. Beginning  2. Getting to Know the Couple and Introducing the Model  2. The Flow and Eddies of the Middle  3. Tracking Cycles  4. Courageous Communication  5. Individual Work  6. Countertransference in Couple Therapy  7. Negotiating Needs  8. You, Me, We? Negotiating Corresponding Needs that Conflict  9. Shaming and Feeling Shamed in Couple Therapy  10. Deepening Experiential Work  11. What Makes a Difficult Case Difficult?  3. Ending  12. Repairing Relationship Rupture  Appendix 1. Unblending  Appendix 2. Unburdening  Glossary  References  Index

Take a journey with Toni Hels!