The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity [Paperback]

Perel is a master at what she does. The New Yorker

[Perel] knows the depth of your shame and the vibrancy of your lust.-The New York Times

From iconic couples therapist and bestselling author ofMating in Captivitycomes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it.

An affair can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experienceuniversally forbidden yet universally practicedis poorly understood.

• Why do people cheateven those in happy marriages?
• Why does an affair hurt so much? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal?
• Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once?
• Can an affair ever help a marriage?

For a decade, psychotherapist andNew York Timesbestselling author Esther Perel traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with cheating. In this illuminating book, she weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis to provide insights and answers to help couples survive and thrive.

Betrayal hurts, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriagewith the same person. Affairs, Perel argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationshipswhat we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern relationships in its many variations.

Esther Perel is widely recognized as the worlds leading expert on marriage.-Sunday Times Style

A fresh look at infidel3X